You can contrast these with the inverse of course.There are many, who, enjoying the false sense of privacy that comes from a throng of strangers are quite content to discuss the most intimate and personal of details on their mobile phone. Recently an additional layer of strange has been heaped upon this by the invention of wireless Bluetooth headsets. It is now quite common to see people confidently and often loudly engaged in unilateral conversations on the train. Gauging whether a person is delusional or merely holding a conversation is quite difficult in practice.

One of the most intriguing elements of travelling on the train or tube is the notion of personal space. If you have never seen a video of the sort of thing that goes on in Japan then consider it recommended that you do. The image of white gloved attendants manhandling passengers should prove indelible and fascinating. Once you have seen what goes on elsewhere it only serves to highlight how odd some of the things that happen here in the UK are.

Take most city platforms between 5.15 and 6.30 for instance. A sizeable group of people are present. The main aim of whom is to return safely to their various places of residence an enjoy what may be left of the evening when they get there. Despite this seemingly clear goal they will quite contentedly insist on maintain their personal space, and allowing others to maintain theirs even where this results in a delay to their journey.

BHG has been known to occasionally use the Docklands Light Railway in South East London. It operates a very useful and regular service. During the working week you can nearly always expect the next train to be no more than ten minutes away; often less than three. Despite this passengers contribute tremendously to delay the system wherever possible. At one terminus in Stratford, the queue of persons waiting to board will calmly line up in front of the doors. Five days each week, fifty-two weeks each year the same group of workers and student will form a human wall in an apparent effort to prevent anyone on the packed train alighting and continuing their journey.

Rules of privacy and conduct apply. The same individual stood in line will avoid eye contact and respond aggressively if their personal space is invaded. Just a few stops up the line, on the same line I should stress, at Canary wharf those waiting for the train wil have formed a pair of orderly lines perpendicular to the line in a display of almost spontaneous organisation. Ants would be proud.

Yes, you guessed it.

Click here to view the embedded video.

To my mind, that’s pretty funny. When she finds out this is on-line she may not agree; enjoy it while it lasts.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Word of the day: Trichotomy
-noun
1 – Division into three parts, classes, categories, etc
2 – An instance of such a division, as in thought, structure, or object
3 – The three part division of human beings into body, spirit, and soul

Editing video is one of those thankless tasks that consumes prodigous amounts of time and gives you little to show for it until you have developed some considerable proficiency. The reason the above is a link rather than an embedded clip is because I am embarrassed by the wildly fluctuating light levels. I just don’t know what I did. One moment it was fine, the next it looks like someone is switching a set of disco lights on and off erratically with a rusty fader.

This is slightly better.

Click here to view the embedded video.

What you can do is plug in a wireless microphone which means that should you graduate from poorly lit unsteady home video clips there are plenty of ways to produce semi-pro videos with this microscopic device. The Kodak Zi8 has a built in rechargeable battery pack, but if you want energy wherever whenever then you could stick with flip as their HD device takes AA batteries. Great for those of us who don’t want to get caught out with no charge.

Wait! I hear you cry who is this gift for?

Oh, you got me! You can check out the video quality here. And while that video was made by someone else I can prove that my Zi8 really was a gift by directing you to the first video that my wife made and uploaded to YouTube using the bundled software.

Ok, yes, I did shoot that video.

Word of the day: Bayou
-noun
1 – a marshy arm, inlet, or outlet of a lake, river, etc., usually sluggish or stagnant.
2 – any of various other often boggy and slow-moving or still bodies of water.

We have learned to sign, talk, write, correspond, telephone, email, mobile phone, blog, and now vlog too; perhaps even in that approximate order. More importantly the art of deception has spread to the masses; it’s no longer the exclusive realm of the politician and mass media editor. Next time you spend an hour looking for the ideal profile picture you will know that any old truth just won’t do!

Where am I going with this? Well, for fear of finding myself completely out of date, I am moving into the world of streaming video. Here’s my first try.

Click here to view the embedded video.