If you can think of something, so can someone else. Now that the world is so big, some of those people who also thought of it use WordPress. Better still, at least one of them probably wrote a plugin that makes it happen.

I’ve just realised that I’ve had an idea for a plugin that may not exist yet. This is unusual for me. Better yet, I think it’s a bit of a corker. Shush. Don’t tell anyone, let’s see if I can crack this on my own first.

Then I’ll have to suffer the ignominy of being the guy with the great idea who watches other people do it better and shinier and more monetized in about twenty seconds. Mind you, it will still have been my idea.

Now, off to my local search engine. I need to make sure I really am the only person who has thought of this.

Oh, and in other news, Christmas is only a few days away. To those of you who are interested. Happy Christmas. To those of you who aren’t cheer up! It’s an opportunity to celebrate when it’s cold and dull outside. Get with it!

Personally, regardless of how you feel about Jesus, I think this is a tremendous time to celebrate ideals and principles that are recognised as universal. Courage, dignity, honour, friendship and trust. All of which are exemplified in the accounts of Jesus’ life. If he’s a myth to you then it should be a poignant one, and worth celebrating. If he is a friend, then all the more so.

Set something aside, let something go and enjoy a warmth that goes beyond even that of the smell of mum’s gravy. Happy Christmas!

It can turn even the most interminable wait into something you can get your teeth in to. I suppose it’s a bit like paint that changes colour as it dries. You just don’t mind watching it.

Unfortunately I’m not aware of a widget or plugin on the market today which can show the readers of a blog how close the author is to writing another post. It would be hugely useful.

Presently when you visit a blog you have no idea if the post you’re reading is soon to be relegated to the annals of history by flurries of new content or if it is the last defiant gasp of a now deceased effort. I think a small indicator, perhaps an hour glass with a % musing completed would be a helpful thing to have around.

I know I’d appreciate one.

I’ve been close to posting for weeks now. All sorts of things have happened. I recovered from a sort of melancholy which snuck up on me from somewhere. We’ve had some wonderful people join us for dinner. I’ve been to the hospital and my local surgery a number of times and I’ve taken more painkillers than I have taken in the last ten years combined.

So. Why the delay?

I’m unsure. It’s not writers’ block. At least I don’t think it is. When I sit down to write I don’t sit sucking my digits wondering how to start. If anything, capturing something from the profusion is the usual problem. (I still think learning to type faster will help with this, anyone have any experience on the matter?)

I have been bereft of both my computer and internet access for a few days on separate and quite unrelated occasions. We’ve had both a power outage and, a first for me, a physical component failure. The graphics card I spent far too much money on simply gave up the ghost. Unusually, at least to my knowledge, the card died while the machine was off. Typically they pop during a frantic moment in a FPS or strategy game when you have one too many triangles too calculate…

But that’s hardly an excuse now is it? Uptime, if that’s a word, has far exceeded downtime. Probably somewhere in the region of 95:5 or 19:1 if you like things as simple as they can be. To my mind 95:5 sits easier but hey, that’s a different topic for another day.

The small and short of it is that I have been thinking about my blog a great deal. I have all sorts of ideas and a number of experiences that I would like to post about. I just haven’t been ready to do it. Until now that is. Now I’m good to go.

Back to the point. If there is one.

I can foresee, though it shouldn’t be much of a surprise to you, that this sort of inappropriately long delay between posts will probably occur again. While I may lack the motivation to post I will probably have the will to give some sort of indication that I am thinking about a post. That the will is building as it were.

I could leave some sort of sign. A marker which advises the patient visitor to wait patiently a little longer before they’ll hear from me again.

Hopefully, like paint that passes from green to pink, it’ll be interesting enough that you’ll hang around to read whatever emerges once the bar reaches the other end. All I need to do now is figure out how on earth I am going to do it.

While I was at it I have refreshed the theme too. I liked the old theme at first but it was getting a little old on me. Let me know what you think of the new one.

I think I need a big hungry giant picture to go with it. Any artists out there?

I’m pleased that the blog is still going as I started last September, it’s been a bit patchy at times but I think I am finally getting into my stride and I certainly enjoy working on the site just as much as I did on day one!

Enough of my bumbling. Go and look at the pretty pictures!

It makes a great deal of sense therefore that someone would make a film about it. After all, what would the world be like if we could control our dreams?

Setting Inception against the wonderfully antagonistic and exciting world of corporate espionage is really smart; setting our feet firmly on the ground while our minds are swept away with the story. The notion that large corporations would be busy attempting to steal ideas from one another is as old as wheeling and dealing itself. It’s certainly firmly embedded in the western psyche and lends a sense of familiarity to a film that abounds with absurdity and absurdities.

Without such a mundane, yet mysterious, premise the movie might have faltered. Instead the all too believable conspiracy, greed, and straight up deception, lend almost limitless credibility to an otherwise ridiculous flight of fancy. How else could one appropriately describe a film principally concerned with very normal people going about stealing thoughts fresh out of the minds of the people who think them?

It’s fantastic.

I can’t really remember when I last found it so easy to let go. The Matrix was masterful, but had to work really hard to keep audiences in the alternate reality. The direct tuition from characters throughout the film to ensure viewers were comfortable with the mechanics of what was meant to be happening are readily apparent.

Inception is smarter. The cues and reminders are there but they’re more graceful, more refined, more incorporated.

The quality of computer generated animation leaps forward almost continuously and each new blockbuster strains to redefine what’s possible by the greatest margin imaginable. The frontiers of script writing have expanded and it is now possible to realise almost anything in a convincing and ‘believable’ fashion. New technology tends to lead to excess. Which is why I am pleased to say that Inception definitely feels like a story first effects second type of movie.

It’s all the more worth watching because of that.

Now go. What are you waiting for? Bedtime?

 It’s not about features. What is? It’s about cool. The iPad has a nice big screen, crisp clean colours, it’s thin and light and it’s expensive. Apple’s ‘unbelievable price’ tagline made BHG smile, although perhaps not for the reason intended.

 BHG watched a fellow commuter drag one of these out of a bag, poor guy flipped through a couple of emails, scanned the newspaper and then settled in to a game of golf. BHG did the same, on his iPod Touch, all the while eyes sliding to the gorgeous display of the iPad. It really does look amazing.

 It’s ‘fun’ device though. This isn’t a laptop. You won’t be enhancing your productivity by owning one of these. Instead it’s a great way to consume. You can play games, watch movies and listen to music and that’s all about screen size. What you shouldn’t expect to do is contribute using one of these devices.

 BHG thinks that a lot of the criticism levelled at the iPad probably comes from this root misunderstanding. You work at a computer, you blog from your laptop, you consume through your iPad. It’s quite clever really, there’s a clear reason for a person to own a full quite of Apple devices. You can see the automotive industry struggling to do something similar but it’s a tactic suited to consumer technology. Everyone has been flogging the obsolescence horse for a clear two decades combining obsolescence with multiple single focus multi purpose devices is just the next step in cute marketing.

 Apple, we who are about to buy, salute you.

I feel strongly that addresses like this one should be considered in their entirety and would encourage even those familiar to read not just the emotive opening statements but the proposals that follow them.

“I am certain that my fellow Americans expect that on my induction into the Presidency I will address them with a candor and a decision which the present situation of our people impel. This is preeminently the time to speak the truth, the whole truth, frankly and boldly. Nor need we shrink from honestly facing conditions in our country today. This great Nation will endure as it has endured, will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. In every dark hour of our national life a leadership of frankness and vigor has met with that understanding and support of the people themselves which is essential to victory. I am convinced that you will again give that support to leadership in these critical days.

“In such a spirit on my part and on yours we face our common difficulties. They concern, thank God, only material things. Values have shrunken to fantastic levels; taxes have risen; our ability to pay has fallen; government of all kinds is faced by serious curtailment of income; the means of exchange are frozen in the currents of trade; the withered leaves of industrial enterprise lie on every side; farmers find no markets for their produce; the savings of many years in thousands of families are gone.

“More important, a host of unemployed citizens face the grim problem of existence, and an equally great number toil with little return. Only a foolish optimist can deny the dark realities of the moment.

“Yet our distress comes from no failure of substance. We are stricken by no plague of locusts. Compared with the perils which our forefathers conquered because they believed and were not afraid, we have still much to be thankful for. Nature still offers her bounty and human efforts have multiplied it. Plenty is at our doorstep, but a generous use of it languishes in the very sight of the supply. Primarily this is because the rulers of the exchange of mankind’s goods have failed, through their own stubbornness and their own incompetence, have admitted their failure, and abdicated. Practices of the unscrupulous money changers stand indicted in the court of public opinion, rejected by the hearts and minds of men.

“True they have tried, but their efforts have been cast in the pattern of an outworn tradition. Faced by failure of credit they have proposed only the lending of more money. Stripped of the lure of profit by which to induce our people to follow their false leadership, they have resorted to exhortations, pleading tearfully for restored confidence. They know only the rules of a generation of self-seekers. They have no vision, and when there is no vision the people perish.

“The money changers have fled from their high seats in the temple of our civilization. We may now restore that temple to the ancient truths. The measure of the restoration lies in the extent to which we apply social values more noble than mere monetary profit.

“Happiness lies not in the mere possession of money; it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort. The joy and moral stimulation of work no longer must be forgotten in the mad chase of evanescent profits. These dark days will be worth all they cost us if they teach us that our true destiny is not to be ministered unto but to minister to ourselves and to our fellow men.

“Recognition of the falsity of material wealth as the standard of success goes hand in hand with the abandonment of the false belief that public office and high political position are to be valued only by the standards of pride of place and personal profit; and there must be an end to a conduct in banking and in business which too often has given to a sacred trust the likeness of callous and selfish wrongdoing. Small wonder that confidence languishes, for it thrives only on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection, on unselfish performance; without them it cannot live.

“Restoration calls, however, not for changes in ethics alone. This Nation asks for action, and action now.

“Our greatest primary task is to put people to work. This is no unsolvable problem if we face it wisely and courageously. It can be accomplished in part by direct recruiting by the Government itself, treating the task as we would treat the emergency of a war, but at the same time, through this employment, accomplishing greatly needed projects to stimulate and reorganize the use of our natural resources.

“Hand in hand with this we must frankly recognize the overbalance of population in our industrial centers and, by engaging on a national scale in a redistribution, endeavor to provide a better use of the land for those best fitted for the land. The task can be helped by definite efforts to raise the values of agricultural products and with this the power to purchase the output of our cities. It can be helped by preventing realistically the tragedy of the growing loss through foreclosure of our small homes and our farms. It can be helped by insistence that the Federal, State, and local governments act forthwith on the demand that their cost be drastically reduced. It can be helped by the unifying of relief activities which today are often scattered, uneconomical, and unequal. It can be helped by national planning for and supervision of all forms of transportation and of communications and other utilities which have a definitely public character. There are many ways in which it can be helped, but it can never be helped merely by talking about it. We must act and act quickly.

“Finally, in our progress toward a resumption of work we require two safeguards against a return of the evils of the old order; there must be a strict supervision of all banking and credits and investments; there must be an end to speculation with other people’s money, and there must be provision for an adequate but sound currency.

“There are the lines of attack. I shall presently urge upon a new Congress in special session detailed measures for their fulfillment, and I shall seek the immediate assistance of the several States.

“Through this program of action we address ourselves to putting our own national house in order and making income balance outgo. Our international trade relations, though vastly important, are in point of time and necessity secondary to the establishment of a sound national economy. I favor as a practical policy the putting of first things first. I shall spare no effort to restore world trade by international economic readjustment, but the emergency at home cannot wait on that accomplishment.

“The basic thought that guides these specific means of national recovery is not narrowly nationalistic. It is the insistence, as a first consideration, upon the interdependence of the various elements in all parts of the United States—a recognition of the old and permanently important manifestation of the American spirit of the pioneer. It is the way to recovery. It is the immediate way. It is the strongest assurance that the recovery will endure.

“In the field of world policy I would dedicate this Nation to the policy of the good neighbor—the neighbor who resolutely respects himself and, because he does so, respects the rights of others—the neighbor who respects his obligations and respects the sanctity of his agreements in and with a world of neighbors.

“If I read the temper of our people correctly, we now realize as we have never realized before our interdependence on each other; that we can not merely take but we must give as well; that if we are to go forward, we must move as a trained and loyal army willing to sacrifice for the good of a common discipline, because without such discipline no progress is made, no leadership becomes effective. We are, I know, ready and willing to submit our lives and property to such discipline, because it makes possible a leadership which aims at a larger good. This I propose to offer, pledging that the larger purposes will bind upon us all as a sacred obligation with a unity of duty hitherto evoked only in time of armed strife.

“With this pledge taken, I assume unhesitatingly the leadership of this great army of our people dedicated to a disciplined attack upon our common problems.

“Action in this image and to this end is feasible under the form of government which we have inherited from our ancestors. Our Constitution is so simple and practical that it is possible always to meet extraordinary needs by changes in emphasis and arrangement without loss of essential form. That is why our constitutional system has proved itself the most superbly enduring political mechanism the modern world has produced. It has met every stress of vast expansion of territory, of foreign wars, of bitter internal strife, of world relations.

“It is to be hoped that the normal balance of executive and legislative authority may be wholly adequate to meet the unprecedented task before us. But it may be that an unprecedented demand and need for undelayed action may call for temporary departure from that normal balance of public procedure.

“I am prepared under my constitutional duty to recommend the measures that a stricken nation in the midst of a stricken world may require. These measures, or such other measures as the Congress may build out of its experience and wisdom, I shall seek, within my constitutional authority, to bring to speedy adoption.

“But in the event that the Congress shall fail to take one of these two courses, and in the event that the national emergency is still critical, I shall not evade the clear course of duty that will then confront me. I shall ask the Congress for the one remaining instrument to meet the crisis—broad Executive power to wage a war against the emergency, as great as the power that would be given to me if we were in fact invaded by a foreign foe.

“For the trust reposed in me I will return the courage and the devotion that befit the time. I can do no less.

“We face the arduous days that lie before us in the warm courage of the national unity; with the clear consciousness of seeking old and precious moral values; with the clean satisfaction that comes from the stern performance of duty by old and young alike. We aim at the assurance of a rounded and permanent national life.

“We do not distrust the future of essential democracy. The people of the United States have not failed. In their need they have registered a mandate that they want direct, vigorous action. They have asked for discipline and direction under leadership. They have made me the present instrument of their wishes. In the spirit of the gift I take it.

“In this dedication of a Nation we humbly ask the blessing of God. May He protect each and every one of us. May He guide me in the days to come.”

Franklin Roosevelt.

Word of the Day: Garniture
- noun

1 – embellishment or ornamentation

But what am I doing now?

The short answer is ‘I’m not sure’. That’s the thing about first days, you are full of expectations and ideas, even if they are pretty dull and inane expectations. You still have them. I arrived knowing that I would be very busy, would be expected to be very organised and would be working around a team of really very senior staff. This last point really serves to add pressure to the mix. After all, it’s a bit harder to crack jokes when colleagues aren’t really colleagues, they’re your boss.

My job title is pretty straightforward, and judging by the events of the day reasonably accurate too. I am an Executive Assistant. Apparently the executive part is there to imply the ability to make decisions independently and ‘get it done’. Things I can do in spades. That’s what I said in the interview anyhow.

Moving jobs, divisions and teams has also brought on a change in location. My previous office is in the thick of things in downtown Stratford. While Stratford (Defiantly not Upon-Avon) may not be the best known place in the world it is destined for considerable advancement and largesse as it will soon play host to the 2012 Olympics and from next year will be the home of one of the largest shopping malls in Europe, not to mention a new international train station.

So if you here anything about the Westfield site or the Westfield Shopping Centre, the Olympic Park or the Athletes’ Village then you should think “Stratford”. Avoid thinking about Shakespeare, he live miles away in Stratford-Upon-Avon. Trust me, the Olympics won’t be there in 2012!

My new team is really quite amiable. I have a healthy list of things to do and I am starting to receive email and work in good doses and that’s after five hours. I could mention the absence of a building induction, or indeed, any form of induction but that would be unfair. I’m quite happy working things out for myself. Indeed after I had picked up my ID card I was quite alright.

The day ended pleasantly with my counterpart giving me a brief whistle-stop tour of the facilities. If you’ve watched Spooks, you’ve seen where I work! What about that eh?

Word of the Day: Palingenesis
- noun

1 – exact reporoduction of ancestral characteristics

I’m not going to say a great deal about it really. Only that initially I forgot all about it. When I remembered I quickly learned a very important lesson.

Don’t eat pancakes you buy from the store. Make your own. I tried some from a supermarket in Stratford which shall remain un-named. Both, the pancakes and the supermarket. Rather than limit my disdain for these appalling creations as marketed by a particular chain I thought it best to condemn them generally. If you would like to nominate some exceptions to this general, and dare I say it, important rule then please comment away!

Making pancakes is easy. Flour, milk and egg. you can fuss about with extras like salt and chocolate chips but really I reccommend that you avoid detailed recipes. All that they lead to is mild panic that you may have added 220g instead of 230g of one ingredient or another. You can’t go too wrong with pancakes.

Take some flour. Plain is best but I have used self-raising too and I’m still breathing. When I say some I mean the sort of amount you would put of a favourite cereal in a breakfast bowl. Some. That’s going to be enough for one person like me and maybe one and a half, or perhaps two, persons of more austere appetite like you. When you have some flour put it in a measuring jug. If you have more than you can fit in a measuring jug then stop eating so much cereal. What are you eating out of? A salad bowl?

Crack an egg and drop it on top of your small mound of flour. yes, the one in the measuring jug. Don’t mix it in yet as this will make a sort of flour-egg glue which will stick to the sides of your measuring jug unpleasantly.

Pour on some milk. Again some. I like the breakfast analogy because that’s how much milk is in some. You know how you pour milk directly onto your cereal in the morning without measuring it? That’s some ‘milk’. Pour that much milk on top of your flour and egg.

Now mix it all up. the toughest part about this stage is not doing it so vigorously that you cover yourself with soft clouds of flour and splashes of eggy milk. Eggy milk doesn’t just rinse off, you’ll have to wash your clothes. Keep the splashes in the pancake mix!

Ok, while you are mixing it up you will learn about the consistency of the mix you have just made. If it is the consistency of milk then you may have poured the milk into an empty bowl rather than the one with the flour and egg in it. Try again please. If your mix is too dry then, again, you may have poured your milk in the wrong bowl or you have just worked out why your cereal is so crunchy all the time!

If the mix is too thick add a little more milk, mix it up and try again. If it is too thin, drop in a little bit of flour. This is actually quite tough to incorporate so I reccomend trying to cook your mix if you think it is too thin before you start trying to add more flour.

Cook a small pancake. Eat said pancake while adjusting the temperature of the pan/griddle and adding salt if required. Remember, you can always add more salt, you cannot take salt away! Be sparing.

That’s it, you now know what to do. Don’t buy them in the stores, make your own. Preferably thin like crepes with lemon and granulated sugar. Mmmm.

Word of the Day: Cachalot
- noun

1 – A sperm whale

Not too shabby eh? There’s more but I don’t want to bore you. What’s that? You’re not bored? Righty o!

Ooh, you can see the Big Hungry Giant in the background of this one. How cute! The baby, I meant the baby!